I AM NOT DEAD YET!!!

                                      ( My struggle against the forces of marketing )


The worse thing that the modern era has produced in the name “Of making our lives better” is marketing. Everyday all of this data is being collected in order to produce better products for people. These products are forced on us everyday by the second worse thing of the modern era, advertisements.


All of this market research data is taken and you should be in society’s “maturity curve”. They took a look at your gender and age. From there they develop the advertising for the products that you need. Whether that is true or not is completely irrelevant. And if you are a responsible person you should immediately go out and get these products. Because this the only way you will be viewed as a viable member of modern society. Who wants to be publicly shamed?


Speaking for myself. Based on the all of junkmail, spam, TV and radio ads that I blasted with everyday. Here is a sample what I am being told I need. A comprehensive cellphone plan, 500+ TV channels, Viagra, and various child care plans. These are the highlights. But I say. Who needs another phone number not to call me on? Ever notice that the more phone numbers, e-mail addresses, etc that a person has the harder it is to get a hold of them or any other response. I have the original satellite dish. Rabbit ears. And I get about seven TV stations. And with this total lack of TV stations. I think I am a very informed individual. It is amazing what this old ability called “reading” can do for you. Viagra. Let’s just say I have never let my self down. OK maybe once but a lot of whisky was involved. A lot. Childcare. Why? I have not even done the whole clichéd starter marriage thing. There are what 10 billion people in this world. I feel no desire to create 10 billion and one person.


So what? That is what I say to all of this. But that so-called “maturity curve” is telling me that I have badly failed. In my desire to be the last thing that modern society wants. An individual. What a rebellious concept. I am not in anyway a fully qualified member of the “target market” that I should be in. And I feel DAMN PROUD. I am going to be positive about this. And when society says I shouldn’t. I look at this as, how well I am doing at skewing the data.


The worse part of this “data collection” happens to me when I venture out to buy music CD’s. According to this so-called music industry at my age I should be enjoying the primary selections from the “Adult contemporary”. Emasculate me right now. Not to say it is all bad per say. But as a primary choice? Are you nuts? I want to take the hand of the store clerk, marketing person, who ever and place it on my neck. And asked them to fell that. You know what that is? It is called a pulse. I AM NOT DEAD YET. I still am capable of rocking out. There is enough time for the “rocking chair” but I am not there yet. Not even close. I still WANNA ROCK. And I do.


Here is what happened to me a few weeks ago. I went looking some music at one of those big advertised target-marketing stores. I went looking through the racks. I bought a live Ronnie James Dio album and Judas Priest’s latest Angel of Retribution. But I was also searching for other older punk and heavy metal albums. Like AC/DC, Ramones, Johnny Thunders, Motorhead, Black Flag, Sabbath, etc. And when you are my age buying or searching albums like this, it tells me one thing: I’m weird. There’s a surprise. Not for me though. If I had a dime for every time I heard that. I would not still be an unknown artist, writer, whatever.  BUT I ROCK. But still I always get that look from the clerk. The look that wants to know. How old are you? I am at the age where I should be joining the PMRC (Parents Music Resource Center. Remember that pathetic 80’s group that purposed censorship in the guise of making better parents.) 


And when you reach my age and still listen to stuff like this it causes people to have issues. They look at me with that look that just says bewilderment. Aren’t you old to still be rebelling? Imagine that. At my age “being myself” is considered to be rebellious. All I know for sure is that “being yourself” is the worse dating advice ever. I should drop everything and join that “target market”. But I guess I still rebelling. The other thing is that people want to tell you all the negative of this music choice. The ever-popular one. Calling it “suicide music”. Bullshit. Want to know what the real “suicide music” is? The Time/Life Love Songs Collection. That does it for me. If listening to all that crap doesn’t make you suicidal enough. Then listening to all that “sugary” crap may make you become diabetic.


The worse reaction is when people look at my selection and wonder why am I so angry.  Didn’t you hear me earlier? I still want to listen to music that rocks. But still I am called “angry”. Since you will not let it go. I might as well go along. Angry. All right then. I will tell you what is making me angry. Ready? Contrary to the policy advertised you do not get “served your way”. Instead of an express lane there should be a line for stupid people who just want to waste time. In fact I believe that there are people out there who feel the only way that they can be noticed is to be in the way. In this land of the free, people willingly choose to be ignorant. In this mass market age quantity has replaced quality. Value should not be solely determined by chart position. IE music and movies. People should know a little more about history before giving their opinion on current events. This goes especially for the talk radio crowd. Either side. There is no real difference between the Democratic and Republican parties. They both use the politics of fear. Forget trying to decipher the “DaVinci Code”. You will get a Nobel Prize for deciphering the “Female Code”. That would be a relevant breakthrough. When will “As seen on TV” be translated into “sucks ass”. And speaking of bad translations. “Do it for the children” is another bullshit mantra. White people should not be able to “pimp” anything. Ever. There should be a limit on “holiday”. Especially those created by the Hallmark Corporation. If the “holiday”, “event” or “special day” has a card then I say you should only get three (3) a year. That is my new rule. So pick your days wisely. In this life why do you need to have someone else validate your “parking”. Finally, (I have to stop somewhere) girls never "go wild" when I am around. And really trying hard not to take it personally.


Believe it or not. The only thing that stops me from having more of these thoughts. Well, it is all of that loud music I listen to. So let me have my CD’s. And leave me alone. Crank my stereo to “11”. It is time to rock.


You may not enjoy it. Oh well. But I am.


In the famous words of AC/DC


“For those about to rock! We salute you!”


Now stop being marketed to.


Choose your own music. 


You are never too old to be yourself.