Making Assessments Again

	John Lennon – Working Class Hero .mp3
	Found at bee mp3 search engine

I have also been looking at the mysteries of life. Like will the TV show Lost end the season with a Soprano’s style ending. But this is really a non relevant side note to the other issues at hand.

It seems like my own personal “DeLorean” seems to have broken its flux capacitor yet again. It seems like I always come back to re-evaluating my blog. The truth is I should from time to time I should look at what I am doing.

I have been contemplating the whole notion of context and its placement. Here is an example. Oil underground is a resource. The same oil taken and dumped on your lawn then becomes pollution. The only thing that has changed is location. This same thought process I am applying to my site. I am trying to figure out how to build traffic. I want that traffic to engage the material posted. My friend who writes the blog Misplaced in the Midwest is in the midst of a flame war on his site. I was a bit jealous because he got a spike in traffic. I also like he was able to generate comments. In the end, love and hate is both the same when it comes to drawing attention on a blog. It may not be pretty but it did get results. He did offer to start one with me just to help. I thought it was cheating to make up a flame war. I just want some acknowledgment. Other than Spammers who are a complete waste of oxygen.

I have been looking to make changes to the look of my website and blog. I have been looking at how to instructions to figure out how to do it. The problem is computer code looks like a combination of my college calculus textbooks combined with my Spanish textbook. It looks like some new age form of Greek to me. I heard someone say this idea once. “It sucks to be creative (I hope I am) because you never have all the skills you need to complete your idea. And it is a pain in the ass trying to find the people and the resources needed to fill in the holes.”

I listened to a SMODcast (Episode#110) that was dealing with how to pay for a podcast site. It leads to a very funny discussion of product endorsement. I wish I could merchandise an idea off of my site. I am nowhere close to that happening.

The other problem is my own internal mental batteries are a bit too drained out lately. There are people who exist in my life that I cannot avoid at the moment. And they are draining me. They always seem to have a problem or act like one. There are people who present you problems as a challenge that can excite. And then there are the others (like the ones here) who do nothing but drag you down. And they will never be happy with anything you say to them or anything you do for them. It is always going to be the same shit with them. This gave me idea for a service Roto-Rooter should provide. Who is better than a plumber in getting blocked up shit flowing again? Therefore, they should offer certain clients colon cleansing treatments. Get their shit out of the way.

My mind wanders when the mental batteries get low. I need to find things that get my mind something to run on. For example, I found new podcasts to listen. They were Tell ‘em Steve-Dave and Freakonomics Radio. I also have been watching the video lectures at TED.org. This is the one that goes with my current thought process (or lack thereof).

I just read the new book from the people behind Keith and the Girl podcast. I bought because I wanted to support a show that makes me laugh and think every time I listen to an episode. Their book is called What Do We Do Know? Smart Answers to You Stupid Relationship Questions. You have never read a relationship book like this one. Read for yourself. They posted the first chapter of the book. Be prepared. They take a very direct approach to questions asked.

I know that I am the last person on the planet who needs a book on relationships. However, this leads into my second part of assessment that I am in. They fact is that when it comes to relationships in my life I am pretty much a social retard on the matter. I think I may have subconsciously began to think about this a few weeks ago when I realized yet another friend was going down for the count. Yes, he was about to get married. Another one lost to the dark side. I went to his stag party a few weeks ago. It makes you wonder why anyone really needs to have a last party like a stag. The stag was the usual affair one may expect. Although observing the two strippers there did give me an insight into how the free market system works. It is amazing how price marks and service levels co-exist. I did contribute to one collection out of curiosity. (Believe it or not. I did not directly participate in any of their act.) Many of the products we purchase throughout our lives are made with the hope that they will miraculously. Just watch an “As Seen on TV” infomercial with anything being peddled by the late Billy Mays. I did win the “mystery bag” in the raffle. It contained a bag of full of adult toys. This was different than my normal bag. It did not contain duct tape, sleeping pills and the keys to a van with no windows. But the winning prize made me wonder. Like who was the person who looked at a fruit roll up snack and thought with some string this could be edible underwear? There is a secret tribe of purple flesh toned people out there who I think are exaggerating just a bit. Size matters as a product. I wonder about the people who actually are paid to take the time to design such products. Do you think they are proud of how they are using their engineering degrees at the reunion?

Continuing on. Here is the trailer from a classic movie.

The movie has been reviewed as being an allegory about the McCarthy Witch Trials of the 1950′s. I think the movie survives to this day as being an allegory about marriage.

I know I am the last person to say anything about marriage or any type of relationship. I am suspicious of anything that is started by a silly ceremony. Some call it tradition. I call tradition an act that makes people suffer like you did. Secretly, no one really likes tradition. Also it concludes with the line, “Until death do we part.” Sounds like a line from a horror movie. And I know how I am. At some point, my wife would actually pencil the day in on the calendar. I am guessing the day would coincide with a holiday that has fireworks associated with it. Celebrate Good Times!

I know I am single. At this point, I know the score. I would like to be with a woman where I can be myself. I do not want a relation that involves having to constantly explain and defend myself. (Been there. Done that. It is the formula for a disaster. And this all I am going to say on it.) It is what it is. I am also being haunted from the memory of my grandmother who always reminded me. “You are so weird. No girl will ever find anything you like to be attractive.” My rebuttal was basically, what you see if what you get. I also got screwed by the writers of the Constitution with the 8^th Amendment. Talk about foresight for a preemptive strike.

There are other reasons I am not married. I believe in the old GI adage. “Never share a foxhole with someone crazier than yourself.” She needs to be crazy but cannot exceed my levels. That is tricky. I always hear a sense of humor is important. It is never in the top 5 listings in a personal ad. I have read the scouting reports. It is also rare to find a woman who can tell a joke. I do not have any biological clock built in me. If I did I am sure it is in a completely different time zone. It comes down to this final observation on why at this stage of life that I am not married. And this might offend some people I know. I have not meant the woman that is willing to accept 50% of my shit. But more importantly I have not meant the woman who I am willing to spend the rest of my life being passive aggressive with. Playing the games that are about the idea of “I love you but first I must defeat you.” It does seem a bit extreme. I am not going into battle against the dark side without a strong flashlight.

“Adversity introduces a man to himself” – Anonymous

Finally another song I discovered to end this posting.

	Port O’Brien – My Will Is Good .mp3
	Found at bee mp3 search engine