General thoughts » Some Assembly Required

Authentic

I am beginning to think that the barrage of pharmaceutical ads for a variety of symptoms has had an impact on people’s attitude. In a way the ads have infected how people look at others. It comes down to this. It is way too easy to get a prescription. It is the illusion of the “quick fix”. All you have to do is swallow and the problem is solved. This mentality has also been subversive in how people view others. However, it takes way more of an effort to understand the script of another person’s existence.

I am also aware of how our society has come to accept “Reality TV” as a valid representation of any person who appears on one of those shows. However, these people are really being created through the filming and editing process of the show’s behind-the-scenes producers. In our mass media age, anything a person says or does can be altered by this process. I am a fan of the Keith and the Girl podcast and many of the guests on the show are comedians. There are quite a few of them who have been contestants on The Last Comic Standing. They all tell the story of how they did not have to stand in line to audition. Their agents did it for them and told them when to show up to do their routine. How they all knew most of the comedians involved already. They also told how they were filmed and how it was changed by the final edit of the show. How their jokes were altered by the edits. Taglines for the jokes were turned into the punch line. In the end, the comedians all had pretty much the same feeling about the show. It was crap. But it was a good way to get their names out there to more people. I am also pretty much skeptical of any reality show contest that has a phone number to vote for your favorite performer of that episode. These vote tallies are never revealed. There is no outside third party monitoring the voting process to help insure the true results. After the 2000 Presidential election, I have begun to feel that in this country we are no longer capable of holding a real legitimate election.

Comedian Doug Stanhope has just posted an article that fits into what I have just stated above. He also feels that his soul has been tainted because he was in the original preview pilot for The Last Comic Standing.

It is hard to be yourself in these modern times. I was thinking about this in another segment of my life. I do not get into much (if at all) in this blog. It is not out of shame or such. I know this blog and that segment would be a hard fit to bring together at this point. And if I did I would spend way too much time trying to explain it and defend it to people who should not get a say in the matter. There is a time and place for everything but not for everyone.

I work for a company that is probably in the Fortune 500 listings. I am guessing about that based on the fact that I cannot afford to buy a share of their stock. I am just going to leave the company nameless. I also want to stay off Human Resources and the Legal Department’s radar to be safe too. The company recently issued its policy for employee use of social network websites. The wanted employees to know their duty is to not to do harm to the company’s image. As I read through the policy I am not sure if I can even mentioned that I am employed at all. I feel like I am in some quasi Witness Protection program. If so I want to be hanging out with “Good Fellas”. Companies want some loyalty. (Loyalty has become a big issue over the last few days with Lebron James incident. I heard a sports analyst sum it up best when it comes to loyalty. He said. When companies stopped giving out pension plans, loyalty was no longer a real option.) I know companies need to have some control on how they operate. But wanting everyone to have “blind faith” can be very dangerous. “Blind faith” is part of what lead to economic meltdown. I think employees should get the same protection as people on the commentary tracks of DVD’s get. “The opinions stated on this DVD are not necessarily those of the Parent Corporation, producers, etc.” And besides if my smart ass comments and insights is the “lynch pin” that brings down the company, their business plan was big time flawed to begin with. People want to be themselves and bring what is within them to work. But it is tough with all of the over-sensitive workplace conduct policies they have to navigate. The current tough economic conditions have brought a lot of fear in to this equation too. But if we could be ourselves at work the self help industry along with daytime television would collapse. If companies are so worried about their image then they should go after and shut down the real domain where their image takes a hit from their workers. The bars. The original of social networking sites. You know why they call it “Happy Hour”? Because you are so happy that after an 8-10 hour work day you finally get to speak your mind. And there is nothing like a cold beer to fuel it. Another note to management. Those Dilbert comics on the bulletin board were not placed there for the irony.

In times like these, I try to seek media that has some sense of honesty about its content. I am a fan of the opening monologues for The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson. He does use cue cards and shoots from the hip per say. His monologue is not just joke after joke in order to prime his studio audience.

I am also looking forward to reading comedian Mike Birbiglia upcoming book “Sleep Walk with Me and Other Painfully True Stories”. I like how he takes his life’s awkward moments and finds the humor in them.

I also try to catch certain shows on TV (when I have cable available) or through the Internet. I am becoming more and more a fan of Mike Rowe from the Discovery Channel’s show Dirty Jobs. You can tell he is actually doing the work himself. There are no tricks of filming or editing to fool you into believing he is doing it. Just watch his reaction during a job. It is genuine. I also still admire his TED speech on how work is viewed and how it really should be seen. The other show on the channel is The Deadliest Catch. The show is the chronicle of Alaskan crab fisherman. A job 99% of the world would never be able to handle. The men on the fishing boats are rough and tough under harsh weather conditions. They are also complex people with all of their strengths and flaws for the world to see. I do not feel they are edited and made into two dimensional stock TV characters. If these guys felt they were being shown in a way that wasn’t them that they would walk away from the show. And the producers of the show would have also been thrown off their boats into the Bering Sea. The face of the show was embodied by Capt Phil Harris. He said “A fairytale starts out ‘Once upon a time.’ A fisherman’s story starts out, ‘This ain’t no bullshit.’” Phil Harris became the center of the show this season with his own death. It was controversial but Phil believed his story needed to have an ending. And if this was the way it was. So be it. He has shown all the dimensions of himself for 5-6 seasons of the show and why stop before the final end. You know how you can determine when you have met a truly authentic person? When you get to know a person you start to realize you have never read a character like this in a book or seen on a movie or TV screen. And you want to share that persons story.

Mike Rowe’s tribute to him sums up why he made his mark on this world.

A few years ago, the producers of The Deadliest Catch made a reality show competition called “America’s Toughest Job”. It was about a group of contestants would do tough and dirty jobs for prize money. The show was also a mistake. The stakes in the show were nothing compared to the people who really have to do it for a living. And they do without having really safety nets and insurance waivers. You cannot take individuals with personality spots to fill and try to make them into real people of character. It just does not work that way. Our modern media age wants to trick you into believing that. The personalities on the shows like The Real World will for the most part come and go without leaving any lasting impression. People of character, like Phil Harris stay with you.

Note to Phil. If you come across a person named Norm where you are. Trust me. He has a voice that can’t be missed. Have a beer with him. He was a lot like you.

Haunted: A Collection of Fragments

There are a lot of things in this life that seems to breakdown. And for me this is the case. The bottle of glue right now does not have enough in it for the job at hand.

This posting is an exercise in trying to write something. Anything.

It is also an attempt to keep things in motion because when things slow down and stop that is when the trouble begins.

I have heard this too often from many different and unrelated people. My voice sounds like that of a person being pulled in hundreds of different directions.

I read the book Haunted by Chuck Palahniuk while ago and lately the tone of the book has been in my psyche. This is a book you should avoid if you have (particularly in this case) a weak stomach. But if you like to challenge yourself through reading something out of the ordinary then you should give this one a chance.

It is the story of a bunch of people who attend a writer’s workshop and are forced to tell their own story. And their stories are of heartbreak, lost and the defects of their own character. They are disturbing and at the same time compelling too.

The thought process of my mind always seeks out sources of information (any source and any format) as an attempt to connect in odd way with the world at large. Look! My mind did not come with any set of operating instructions. At times it even baffles the Big Guy. I am always finding new sources of knowledge to put into my brain. I am trying to figure out if my current circumstances or my past experiences have some place of context in this world. For example (not really), there is one that I cannot go into detail because it is not completely my own to tell. And besides I was also told to shut up about it too. But I am trying to come to terms with it and it is implications. I need something out there to compare and contrast it with. Luckily, I have been listening a lot lately to comedian Doug Stanhope and his tale of “Bobbie Barnett”. (WARNING: Do not play this at work or with the kids around). It should also be noted that in times of stress I seek out humor. The more “twisted and odd” that it is the better.

I also have a mind that remembers things at the oddest of times. And I am at a lost at why I would be remembering it at all. (Maybe at a later point in time I will be more willing and even capable of giving an example.) Soon enough the situation I find myself in and the memory become relevant. (I wish I could recognize the memory is really a “heads up warning”.)And sadly, most of the time it is one of hardship and/or lost. Recently, this was the case and in more than one circumstance. I am not going to spell out the details. I am not ready to, willing to nor am I really capable at this point to give the details. Maybe it is because I have not come to their full insight and wisdom. I just want to just acknowledge for the time being that behind it all there is a thought or two trying to manifest themselves. They are slowly churning about like the burritos I had for lunch.

I heard this from Dan Kennedy in his performance at The Moth. “My therapist told me, ‘When you go forward you will be intuitively able to handle what used to baffle you.”

I am just going to try to keep moving forward. But I have to admit. I am beginning to tire of feeling like I am constantly being “run over”.

And finally, maybe the past like the future is something we will never fully grasp.

	Johnny Thunders – You Can’t Put Your Arms Around A Memory .mp3

	Found at bee mp3 search engine

Tumbling About on Yet another Cycle

Today’s post is brought to you by the numbers 4 – 8 – 15 – 16 – 23 – 42. Along with following:

Watched the series finale of Lost. And maybe the real lesson of the show about life in general is that not all the questions will be answered. But we will still spend a lot of time regardless in analyzing the question wondering why there is no firm answer.
In today’s world of high speed Internet access we somehow think we are entitled to get the answers to anything returned to us at the same speed.
Why is there a perception that whatever you endeavor in doing does not seem to be valid by others if it does not produce a pay stub or a certificate to hang on your wall?
Beware of anyone’s personal revelations if they speak of them with a religious fervor. And if they sum up the religious experience as, “It’s wonderful.” RUN!
Watched Akira Kurosawa’s classic Rashomon. There is always a different perspective to any story. Especially your own.

I was watching the workers across the street from where I work. They were power washing the paint of an old building that is being rehabbed. They were stripping away the old paint and you are now beginning to see what the building use to look like. I guess it is a metaphor for my current mood and thought processing. Let me tell you. It can get very strange at times what makes me pause, think and then turn into a writing piece.

Another metaphor came to me. Life is like the illusion of a washing machine. You somehow believe you can go in covered in dirt and shit, get cleaned and pretend like nothing happened. Purity in any state is temporary. It is a state you find yourself in purely by accident.

The weather this week has been very nice. But it takes a while to adjust to the warmth after winters here. I sat outside enjoying it. Weekend mornings sitting outside with a cup of coffee and a good book are very refreshing. I also took time to look around.

You begin to notice what has grown. This is a photo of tree I planted from seed about 4 years ago. And it is about 20ft tall.

You notice what has died but yet still has left a mark behind.

And then you see what may have the potential to grow.

The photo is showing the start of this year’s garden.

I guess this posting is in a way an aftermath of where I have lived for many years. I live right next to a cemetery. I know that really spooks a lot of people out. It really is not that creepy. I have never had to tell the undead to get off my lawn. It does from time to time make you ponder the whole cycle of life.
The only answer I can up with. The cycle of life is something we cannot escape. No matter what we purchase and consume to escape from it.
Over the years, I have made a few other observations about the view from a cemetery. But as I look at them on the notepad I have decided to save them for another time. Or in another writing piece.

Now my life cycle.

I realize that no matter how hard at times it is that I must continue writing. But I also realize there is another factor to it. And it may sound a bit darker than it actually is to an outsider. I have either read heard this idea from many different sources. People like comedians and writers are not generally “happy” people. They are hyperaware most of the times. They are constantly observing things, from there deconstructing them and finally reconstructing them in their work. At this stage, I am going to have to agree for the most part with that assessment. I am never going to be a person who is one of those “shiny happy people”. (I really like R.E.M. but that song is really fucking annoying.) I am just trying to achieve a personal state of being “content” within a given moment. I also realize that I am “funny”. But it does not necessarily equate to “happiness”. I have to come to terms that I do in fact have the “disease”. And others will have to accept the fact that there is no “cure”. So they will have to just find a way to deal with it.

I am going to try to increase my output of writing. I am trying to stay in motion to eventually arrive somewhere. My notebook is filling up with ideas and references. The hard part is sifting through the ideas. However, most of the ideas will never be used but they help fuel the thinking. This is also the part I have to for the most part on my own. I have not found the right person or persons with whom I can bounce ideas around with. I have also found most people will not display their work unless it has achieved in their mind “perfection”. I like throwing out an idea or a premise on to the “wall” and pound into shape from there. I like playing around with ideas and premises. Most people want the point first. They are not about trying to find the point. I am also trying to become efficient with the writing process. The efficiency equation is defined as work output divided by work input. But writing is hard to quantify by a mathematical formula.
It is hard to adjust how people perceive a writing piece. They read for entertainment and maybe for the information. They do not realize that from the other side that piece was an act of labor. They may read the post like this in a few minutes. For example, the ideas in this post spent a couple of days being formatted on a piece paper. In the end, it is as it is.

And there are more ideas being written on the notepad.

Taking a Walk About through the Outbacks of My Psyche

The following mental ingredients for this post are still be evaluated by the FDA to ensure their safety for human consumption.

The following albums I have been listening to on a “heavy rotation”.

Neil Young- Harvest and Rust Never Sleeps

Pink Floyd – Animals

Port O’Brien – Threadbare

The Church- Starfish
Read the book The Checklist Manifesto by Atul Gawande. And I am currently trying to digest Self-reliance by Ralph Waldo Emerson.
The Book of Ecclesiastes may be on to something by saying “It’s all vanity.” And also the price of knowledge on this world is you basically end up on your own.
I wish this was not a benchmark event year. But I need to beat the rush. I have been thinking about planning or writing out a “mid-life crisis” scenario that would be above and beyond what took place in the movie The Hangover. However, to do so would make it seem less than spontaneous. It would also come off as being staged and fake like that found in 99% of all so-called “reality” shows. Plus the paper trial would come back to haunt in any follow lawsuits over the event.
A quote from an episode of The Moth podcast. “You may have two different faces but you see the world through the same eyes”- Craig Chester

There are a couple of parks near where I work that I like to go to during my lunch break. Weather permitting. It can be at times a real good way to re-charge my internal mental batteries. That lately have been drained way too easily. When anyone sees me walking by myself in one of these parks they tend to have that look to their face. The look that suggests that someone I may look like that person they know as “Suspect”. And they tend to stare at me a bit longer make sure that I might look a bit like the lastest release made by police sketch artist. It does not bother me that much. It is just a by-product of people who watched too many horror movies about the “lone killer”. This is also made me think why solitary confinement is so effective. You are left with your best ally and your own worst enemy with no referee to moderate.

These walks are meant as a way to tempoarily to clear my head. Life can be hectic. I finally know why for generations there has always been a plea to “get back to nature”. If we could live like our ancestors. The reality is we can never live in nature on the same terms as our ancestors did. We have more knowledge about nature than ever before. We have mapped the whole planet. We know where the rivers run. We know what is on the other side of the mountain. We know how long it takes to get to the destination. Space and time in regards to travel is a better known and calculated number nowadays. There is better equipment available to us. A simple desk calculator has more power than all the computers did when man first landed on the moon 40 years ago.We look at the big map on the wall, synchronize our watches and we can see the journey ahead. It is when the journey begins that all the aspects and challenges come into play. So what does it mean? A lot of us need to chill out on the roads and at the airports.

Everyone at some point wants to strip down their life to its barest essentials. And that represents “being one with nature”. It is this notion with view with a sense of purity. However, this is where we can get a bit arrogant. Just because our intentions are good does not mean nature itself will return the favor. Nature is going to act whatever way it is going. Our status in life has no impact on how nature is going to act. It does look at a spreadsheet of people’s wealth before acting.However, people in their pride think they are entitled to act without regards to nature. Example, the animals are not here to sing us show tunes and dance with us in the woods. Walt Disney lied to you. You are on the menu along with everything else in the forest. Remember that.

The outdoors gives us a reason to turn off all the electronics that are now part of our lives. Pandora is not going to put all that shit back in the box for us. A walk through the woods gives a good excuse to be a bit introspective. Because we want perspective. There is a camp that I have been going to for about 30 years at this point. I like the program over there and I like the camp. But at this point in time both of them need a reevaluation of their role and place in my life. I do not want to eliminate them but I know they need to be reassessed. When I was younger, I promised I would never be one of those “old timers” who complains things ran better back in the days. As I was next to creek that runs through camp one morning. I began to think about how nostalgia can be a dangerous idea. Because nostalgia is always looking back in time. But time moves like the river. It goes forward on. At least, there is a place to act as some kind of marker on the trail. Where ever that may lead. At this point, I am no sure where the trail is exactly going.

“To get the answers to the questions. Then you have to accept the challenges”. – Jody Williams.

It’s Just Stupid. So What.

Let me start with laying out my mental tangents behind the thinking that went into this posting.

I have said this before and I am beginning to realize that the mentality is spreading. There is more and more information available to anyone. And it is not hard to access. But I think people want to be dictated to rather than discover things for themselves.
The Uncle John Bathroom Readers are great source of knowledge that will be only useful in irrelevant trivia games. And they .help pass time on the dumper.
Desire to try Squirrel Fishing.
“The Dilbert Principle” by Scott Adams. He states that they only true source of renewable energy is stupidity. And when we learn to harvest it then the energy crisis will be over with.

A few weeks ago, I went to watch someone get a tattoo. I want it known that I HATE needles. Needles are what stopped from having a heroin habit. So it was a big thing for me to see there while someone had needles applied to him with the same sound as a dentist’s drill. It was amazing I did not pass out or run out of the place. I just do not understand why you would want to have a tattoo to begin with. However, I am not going to stop anyone from doing it. But I do believe you should provide a mental exam on what you want and where you want it on your body. It is just not for me. I am moody enough and I could never settle on a design to be permanently on my body. I also had another revelation about the meaning behind tattoos. And this is what I realized. I have never had a person or event in my life that I would want immortalized as part of my body. And if I did. I still will NOT get a tattoo.

I have read several times Chuck Palahniuk’s collection of stories Stranger than Fiction. Some examples were the story of small town that has a demolition derby with combines, people who built their own castles and the author running around town dressed in a dog costume. The major premise about the book is it is about people who are trying to connect to the world through what is perceived to be “strange ways”.

I have also have found myself lately being fascinated more and more by the psychology (or lack of) in sports. I just read Sports from Hell by Rick Reilly. In the book, he follows and sometimes participates in what many would consider just plain stupid. Examples from this book include chess boxing, ferret legging, jarts, drinking games and baseball. The part that I found was that people who take part in these events are happy about it. They have a chance to compete in something and experience the thrill of being cheered on by others. These sports also had a history behind them. It was there but many of the people could not quote specific reference about them.

Strange ideas (or in this case sports) had to start somewhere. Someone came up with an idea and was able to sell the idea to others. And sell it to point where they were willing to get up off their ass and actually do it. In the book, Brain Droppings by the late George Carlin called this guy the “Primitive Sergeant”. In early days of man, he had to come up ideas and sell them to the tribe. He had no research to back up the idea but he had to make it sound good. What did he come up with in order to assure a good corn crop? Virgin sacrifices. Talk about a “leap of logic”. Virgins do not get a good reputation in 80′s teen movies and most religions. Many religions proclaim virgins as being of “purity” However, they end up being the first ones sacrificed or beholden to lunatics. If virgins want to survive just a little longer in this life the message is “get it done” and the sooner the better. But then again when it comes to sexuality and religion there will always be trouble. Especially if a naked woman is involved. And it started with Adam and Eve. Adam provided the first documented case of a “man acting like an idiot”. I know. He did not have to “bite the apple”. That was not the problem. The problem was he actually listened and believed Eve when she implied “Don’t worry about it”. AND he was SOBER. But then again she was probably also shaking her breasts in Adam’s face as she was convincing him to take that bite. Logic and entertainment have always been in conflict since day one. And the reward was being kicked out of the Garden of Eden. Adam then had to think about the future. He needed to find food and shelter. He also needed to make sure the next time there was trouble with Eve that he needed to have excuse for his behavior. And finding alcohol was added to the list. This is also why men became genetically wired not to listen to women. Finally, MILF porn is another example of “purity” vs. “actuality”.

Remember someone hundreds of years ago sold the idea of the “Baby Drop” as being a practical health option for the children.

There is a very thin line between what you view as being fun. And what others might consider a sure sign of mental illness. How it is received all depends on the proximity of a lawyer, an insurance agent or your Mom. Mark Twain said, “Nothing so needs reforming as other people’s habits.” Nothing drives people into a sense of “righteous crazy” then the actions of others. The problem is most of time these two groups will NEVER be in the same room together. I remember what a reviewer said about one of the Jackass movies. He said it was not his type of fun. But he found it was a good documentary about a group of guys who were willing to come with stupid stunts. And they were even more willing to actually perform the stunts. This movie celebrated their unique bond with each other and it should be viewed within that context. I have to agree. And to be honest, the movies made me cringe and laugh at the same time. This is a relief compared to listening to politicians who when I watch them just make me cringe. These are the ones who truly deserve the protest. The Jackass guys are willing to stand behind their words and stunts. Politicians spend too much time back tracking on what they have said. Saying they were taking out of context. MEMO to all politicians. Thanks to the Internet we now all have a copy of what you said and we will play it back to you. MEMO to all parents. Which group is more honest of these two groups? Which one that deep down you think your kids should be watching? But then again I do not have to live with either one of these groups. So my judgment should be the final call here. But I am making suggestion. They are not on my insurance policy.

There used to be a tradition for first time campers when they are young. However, today it is considered hazing and can wreck a young child’s esteem. It is called the Snipe Hunt. It is where you make some believe there is a stupid and elusive bird that needs to be hunted down. There is an important lesson to be learned from this exercise. You need to know how to detect when someone is bullshitting you. Even Frasier on Cheers came to this revelation.

It comes down to it at the end. There is a difference between “stupid” and “ignorance”. It is called a laugh track.

	thick brick .mp3

	Found at bee mp3 search engine

But I did find a reason for becoming a parent.

As Forrest Gump noted, “Stupid is as stupid does.” So I follow you Dad.

Why can’t I hear the laugh track?

Authentic

Haunted: A Collection of Fragments

Tumbling About on Yet another Cycle

Taking a Walk About through the Outbacks of My Psyche

It’s Just Stupid. So What.

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