My friend Mike sent me a link to a site called Mindmeister. It is a site for mapping out one’s mind. I really have not had the time to really delve into the site. He said it would be a good way to organize my thoughts in regards to my writing. It may be true and I might do it. However, I am a little suspicious of his motivation. I think he is just trying to “build the case against me”. And he just does not have the time to do the investigative work himself. If the state is going to prosecute you they have to do some “legwork” first. They do not have the ability to just have you fill out a survey so they can prosecute for your answers. It does not work like that in the court system. The tax system is another story.

Let me attempt a try at giving you an explanation of how my mind may work. I am by nature a curious person. This led me to a lot of trouble in my early education years. It also was scarred by being in a Catholic school. We were always being told that we had to have something to read or do quietly whenever we finished our class work. I was always in trouble for what I brought to school to read. Comic books, MAD magazine, etc. I was never told “Why” they were bad. If you are not going to explain “why” then you will never be able to satisfy a curious person. In fact, over time your lack of explanation feeds a rebellious tendency in that person. The answer, “Because I said so!” is the response of a person on seriously out of control personal power trip. For those of you who have been known to play a drinking game from time to time. It is the basis of the drinking game called Asshole. It does not require skill. It is more about having an arbitrary position.

I have a visual mind and usually see things through images. This is why I failed at math throughout my school years. I do not see “numbers” as an example. I can look at pictures and assemble things from them. This is one of my mom’s favorite stories about me when I was about two years old. I was a quiet kid who did not speak a lot. I could build things though. I used the color patterns on the rug in the dining room to build “roads” for my Matchbox and Hot Wheels cars. My grandparents bought me a big can of Tinker Toys. This was a toy you build things with using various sticks and connectors. I now feel old when I realize my toys as a child required as a goal that I put them together myself. This does not seem to be as true now days. Tinker Toys came with a small booklet of things you can build with the various sticks and connectors. So for the next week or so I sat down and built them all. I just looked at the picture and then the pieces. And from there I put them together. The instructions started with simple things and progressed to more complicated ones which required all of the pieces. I eventually worked up to those. I built the most complicated one and showed it off to my mom. She looked at it and thought that I had not put it together right. I looked her and without saying a word showed her the picture in the instruction book. She studied it and realized that I indeed had assembled correctly.

I will now lay blame to biggest influence on my childhood imagination. The first time I ever saw a movie that felt that it looked like the imagination in my head was Star Wars. I remember just sitting glued into my seat at the movie theater. It caught my imagination hard. A few months later, when the toys were coming out I was completely into it. I would go to school and just draw out Star Wars pictures and the after school go home and act out the scenes with my toy action figures. I would come up with new stories every time I would get a new figure. In fact, I bought certain ones based on the ideas of which stories I wanted to tell next. The problem was in second grade I would rather draw the stories then do my real school work. I would be constantly yelled and told such use of my time was a waste. I also discovered comic books. I like that I could see how images and words worked together. And this is why films fascinate me. But I could never successfully explain to my teacher why it was not a waste of time. That is called back talking. I had quite a few walks to the principal’s office. My footprints will be forever etched into that floor. However, I realize that the teacher had no imagination (most of them do not anyways). Those who can’t…teach. I still read Star Wars novels and watch the movies because I am still discovering things about them. It is a very dense story. There are many facets to it. I wish when I was kid there was Wookieepedia. I read the book about a decade ago called Star Wars: The Magic of Myth by Mary Henderson. It is about the elements that make up the story of Star Wars itself. It kept referencing the book The Hero with a Thousand Faces by Joseph Campbell. He explores how man has been writing and rewriting the same story since man was able to write. This is how it works for me. I find something that fuels my imagination and then I want more information about it.

I am trying to become a better writer. And that will be the goal until the end. Stephen King in his book On Writing said, “If you do not have the time to read. Then you do not have the time to write. Because you do not have the tools to write.” Here is another example of the mind in action. I like a good story. I like the story even better if there is strong character development. This is why I enjoy the Spenser series from author Robert Parker. It was the influence behind the Spenser: For Hire TV series. He has strong characters and he does not get caught up in using many words to tell the story. Spenser is man who no matter what will solve the case even when he is told to stay away. he has principals and a belief in them. Author Stephen Hunter created the character of Bobby Lee Swagger that he used in several of his novels. Swagger is a former army sniper who gets caught in situation that fall into the category of “right man at the wrong time”. I just read his latest appearance in the novel The 47^th Samurai. I will not go into the plot details. I just want to point out how I find things that make me curious and I want find out more. In the book, Swagger studies Japanese samurai culture by watching that genre of films. So now a few of those titles  such as Twilight Samurai, The 47 Ronin and When the Last Sword is Drawn will go into the Netflix queue. There was also the mention of a book entitled The Nobility of Failure. And I am trying to locate a copy to read. I think it could provide some enlightenment for some other thoughts in my head.

This is how it works in a nutshell. I find a good story. I then try to find some details about elements that went into story. And from there I want to see how it all contributed to final “assembly” of the story. On top of it all, westerns, kung fu and samurai films are the ones that seem to be grabbing my attention at the moment. So you have been warned.

I know most people will not read a book or watch a movie that I mentioned. It would take some effort on their part. We are in a world where knowledge seems to be condensed into quick sound bites. And this is not what I am about. I know most people want to be told what to read or see. They do not want to empower themselves with a sense of discovery. They base their quest for knowledge more on what they know rather than what they do not know. I know I will never get to control the “remote” for the masses nor do I want to. I know I do get choose the station, book, movie or the event. So be it. I like how I am trying to discover things. Speaking of which. Last year, I went on a few ghost hunts. You can believe it or not. I did see and hear things. However, as is very common in such situations the evidence did not show up on film. But my X-Files Quest will continue. Does anyone out there know of a good area in the Northeast United States for a UFO hunt?

In the end, I am just attempting to layout a map. But to be truthful, I am not sure how the map works all the time. If I did then I am afraid it will ruin all of the magic.

Woody Allen once said, “”If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.”

It seems like a constant struggle to stay ahead of things lately. And as a so called “grown” adult I should know better now. If I was better funded I would pay for a secretary and a maid. And I would take them as 2 for 1 deal if I could.

I try am trying to stay on top of things and I keep failing miserably.

I have to find a way of avoiding people who expect me to know by reading their minds. If I could do that I would be better at dating because I would have won the lottery by now. I planned to have had accomplished some things by now. Like a few writing projects. A cleaner apartment. And things like that. But I keep finding out about the other things I need to do at the last minute. I always have to make last minutes adjustments. The reason is I am the last it seems “to get the memo”. And people wonder why I get pissed off. It is simple if you do not call and tell me than I have no idea what is going on. A deal breaker for me is to not even return a phone call. Or in this modern age an e-mail. I do not want to waste your time so do not waste my time. But the there is possible upside to not being called back. You begin to realize that your time has value and these people do not. And people who want to “read their minds” are definitely bumped to the head of this list.

But I need to continue on.

I watched the “The Last Lecture” this week. It makes you start to put things in perspective in ways you never thought about.

I also need to things that are inspiring and help to reassure you. And when you are the only person you know who is trying to do something it can be rough at times. I.E. being a writer. So you have to “do it yourself” more times than you can count. So I keep reminding myself with this series of videos. DIY or Die: How to Survive as an Independent Artist.

I want to say that I have a lot of projects that seem to be “colliding” together all at once. So to my regular readers, my blog postings may become a bit more sporadic that normal. I have been working a few longer scripts which maybe finally get done sometime over the next few months. As usual nothing will be posted until at least a first draft is done.

But for now it is “back to the grindstone”.

I have decided to add a new Category into my blog. It is called “Reference”. If there is a book, movie, website that I keep mentioning then it will fall into this new category. This is something that I find must have some significant value if I keep mentioning it. It probably could also be known as an influence. This may also provide some possible insight on “where I am coming from”. (NOTE: The bar or the bathroom is not the answer to this question. At least not at this moment.)

The first one that falls into this new category is from the blog GapingVoid. There is an article posting called How to be Creative that I find myself reading about once a month. So this must be a very reference for me. In this case it is more like a coaching tool. I have also found something new on the site too. There has been a series of podcasts (about 3 so far) that I have found very informative. They are conversations about the Internet, marketing, collaboration and other things. Right now they are topics I am very much interested in as I try to grow my website. Maybe “grow” may a premature term to be using right now. I am really trying to get a grasp on the content and presentation of my website. Here are the links for them Episode 1, Episode 2, Episode 3 if you want to check them out. And by the way I am always looking for podcasts like this to listen to during the work day. It makes me feel productive. At least I am listening to something informative. And it blocks out workplace gossip and people’s stupid cell phone conversations. I also need to be working on the “tools” needed to develop this site when and where I can.