They say that the “devil is in the details”. Given this maxim. Let me say, I must be holding a convention for a cult. And this condition seems to happen to me every year during the months of May and June.
We all think we are all better than the “average” when it comes to how we perceive ourselves against Life’s “Learning Curve”. The problem is there are two variables calculated into that curve that we have no control over. And any “illusion” of such control is more of a “delusion”. Those variables are people and circumstances. It only takes a “blink of an eye” and without warning they change. And all of a sudden, you are nowhere close to where you thought were in regards to the curve. And even worse is the fact you feel well “behind the 8 Ball”. The marathon starts from there.
I do not want to go into the full details behind the preceding paragraph. The causes and the situations which lead me to the thought is very much still a” developing situation”.
There are always details which no matter how hard you try to account for you somehow miss. It came to mind via a “critical situation”. I know this time of year can go “crazy” for me and I need to take the time to do things to get out of it for a brief amount of time. Here is an example. I had not gone geocaching in a while. So I find some online and decided to find some. There were a few in a park near where I work. It would be nice to go to a park for lunch and then take some time to find a couple of caches. It would seem like a nice break. I would get some coordinates and read the clues given to find them. Nothing is as easy as it seems. I should have been able to find them. However, with the information given to me for some reason I did not find myself anywhere close to finding them. And going up against the time limit of my lunch time I was to be “frustrated”.
There are always details it seems. There is a small thing that I must have missed. Information versus experience always seems to leave a “great divide”. This reminded me off other things in my life. It is about “what I need to do” versus my own limitations. For example, I need to replace the burner in my propane grill. However, a couple of years ago I had a mishap with my backpacking stove that left me with a nice scar of my hand. My stove had a leak that I did not see which caused the liquid fuel to blow back on me. I was lucky because it could have been much worse. However, it left me a bit “gun shy” about adjusting such items. A scar may a “souvenir” that shows you somehow “you survived”. The other side is no one ever got a scar from doing something “intelligent”. Einstein never rolled up his sleeve to show a scar going up his arm. He never said, “Look at this. I got this making E=m and c squared.”
It is like the leaky faucet I know I have to fix. However, I look at the “How To Manual” on to do make the repairs. They make the repair seems to appear as a “quick fix”. But I am bit nervous following a “How to Manual” published by Home Depot. A store I have no choice in having to deal with when it comes to certain home repair needs. However, I never am able to find someone who is truly “helpful” or even pleasant there. So how did they find enough people to put together such as manual? However, I know my limitations and realize there are things that I need to get done but are a bit beyond my “grasp”. The paradox, is given such does not remove me from the “obligation”.
Life can also seem a bit “strange” about how things come about that would never have otherwise been revealed. It was post from the Accidental Creative entitled 25 Questions to Ask When You’re Stuck. I had to print it out and put it on the wall. It is something to focus on when I am pacing about the room in the midst of thought.
I guess for me it is all a reoccurring “seasonal allergy” at this point.
I watched the movie Stripes once again. The movie starts with a man (Bill Murray) who comes to realize his life needs a change and so he decides to join the army. I think Bill Murray represents how many men feel at some point in their lives. The plea toward a woman in his life that basically cries out, “Look I know I am a mess at the moment. But love me anyways. Pleeeaasse?”
I can relate to the scene. However, the music would not be Tito Puente. My force of musical choice would include Hawkwind, The Killing Joke, or Captain Beefheart. Or the current eclectic radio dial selection of Molotov Jukebox.
It also reminds me of what I know I bring to a relationship. (Not much) I can imagine the scenario playing like this. I would be in some type of “funk”. She would look at me and say, “Seriously? This is the type of lifestyle you want to defend?”
I reply with, “Well….”
“Hey asshole. All of your potential is doing nothing in regards to our bank account.”
I would start to have thoughts in my head.
“Wow. She’s really smart. But wait. If that is case. What is she doing with me?”
And then I would brighten up. “I finally have something to hold over on her.”
And the other voice in my head would step up and say, “That’s called duct tape.”
Duct tape fixes many things. Right?
There is the moment in the movie where Army live might have some “levity”.
However, I would take just one “doughnut break”. And things would snap into reality. And this how I think that would be reenacted.
I have too much respect for what they do and the last thing they did is my “smart ass” into the mix. And they will never play my theme song. No matter what I do.
My life’s mystery. I keep hearing about how women say, “A sense of humor” is important. Well, I have yet to meet the one that actually demand it. And trying to find one who can “match” mine is like looking for the Loch Ness Monster.
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